August Book of the Month Discussion: My Life as a White Trash Zombie

Our book of the month on Fantasy Floozies is when five anal females come together to read a book and talk about it.

Megan

Dara

Alicia

Kenya

Ren

The rules are that we have to read at least up until 30% whether we like it or not.

August Book of the Month Discussion

Book Summary

Angel Crawford is a loser.

Living with her alcoholic deadbeat dad in the swamps of southern Louisiana, she's a high school dropout with a pill habit and a criminal record who's been fired from more crap jobs than she can count. Now on probation for a felony, it seems that Angel will never pull herself out of the downward spiral her life has taken.

That is, until the day she wakes up in the ER after overdosing on painkillers. Angel remembers being in an horrible car crash, but she doesn't have a mark on her. To add to the weirdness, she receives an anonymous letter telling her there's a job waiting for her at the parish morgue—and that it's an offer she doesn't dare refuse.

Before she knows it she's dealing with a huge crush on a certain hunky deputy and a brand new addiction: an overpowering craving for brains. Plus, her morgue is filling up with the victims of a serial killer who decapitates his prey—just when she's hungriest!

Angel's going to have to grow up fast if she wants to keep this job and stay in one piece. Because if she doesn't, she's dead meat.

Literally.

Book Discussion: Hosted by Megan Martin 

Megan

Well what was everyone's initial reaction?

Ren

ZZZZzzzzzZZZZzzzz

Dara

My Life as a tortured Reader

Sorry, my filter is less when I'm tired.

Everyone laughs at Dara

Alicia

I didn't hate it. I just didn't love it either. It was blah.

Megan

I didn't really feel tortured, not in the beginning

Alicia

me either. . .more like the female in the center of men in a Bukkake experience.

i'm not tortured but i don't want come on my face either. :-/

Megan

thank you for that Kenya

How did yall feel about ANGEL?

Kenya

The writing was great. I just didn't care about Angel in anyway. I couldn't relate. She wasn't interesting.

She was kind of really dumb.

Ren

If she whined one more time about having to eat brains I was going to blow mine out!!

Alicia

interesting-ness?

interestingosity?

interestingation?

I found it was missing those things.

Megan

Of course it was missing those Alicia. I don't think those are words. And. . .I mean I would have complained about eating brains too.

Alicia

Those Are too WORDS!

Dara

I didn't care about Angel. I was loading my shot gun up with zombie killing ammo... Just sayin!

She was supposed to be this bad girl, but none of the bad stuff was actually happening to her. She had her shit pretty much together in the first 30%. Maybe she was just too reasonable--which conflicted with how she thought of herself.

Alicia

And her life wasn't interesting. She went to the morgue and did morgue stuff and ate brains--that was the entire first 30%.

Ren

There were certain parts that had me doubled over with laughter but the suckfest ruined it

Kenya

I agree with Alicia. I thought I was getting a flawed character instead she was Mary Poppins that had a drug habit long ago.

Megan

I liked the whole brains in jars thing. I thought it was really funny--and that it was a zombie POV situation

What was your favorite part?

Kenya

I don't have a favorite part, just a favorite set of sentences: "Glass and blood and metal. A broken body beside me. Teeth and hunger. Gobbets of flesh ripped away." And then boredom

Alicia

I didn't finish. Quit at 30%. And at that point, there was still no plot.

Megan

That's a good quote minus boredom part!

Kenya

It lacked penis...seriously...40% and no penis is no bueno!!

Everyone laughs at Ren!!

Kenya

So immature Ren!!

(Really agrees with Ren but is trying to change her image of being a horn dog)

Megan

Sadly... I'm not sure. To be honest I kept asking myself... What is the point of this story.Great concept. Needed better execution! And the ex-boyfriend was gross.

Dara

Are we forgetting that they start to rot if they're not up on their brain consumption. Talk about a mood killer and EWWWWWWW!

The plot was... zzzzzz!

Ren

I wishes she would have owned that shit. If she were a badass I would have been happy. She was just annoying!

Things that you would have changed?

Ren

I thought for sure there would be a killer kegger in there! It would have been a little more interesting for her to at least try to get smashed!

Kenya

I would have liked to see something happen to her vagina due to her being a Zombie. Maybe make it extra sensitive or have a penis form from her clitoris.

Alicia

In defense of the lack of drugs and partying, the mellowing drugs she took to relax, and also the beer, didn't affect her after she became a zombie. So maybe she lost interest (and thus, became a very boring zombie). 

Ren

ewww extra fishy! @Kenya

nasty cracked and chafing vajayjay!!

Megan

REALLY Kenya?

Alicia

 Megan, sometimes it's best to just ignore Kenya!

Kenya

it would have added flare!(ignoring me only makes me stronger!! BHAHAHAH I'm like the Easter Bunny. . .)

Megan

Okay so now that we are talking about clits growing penisis...penises!! I think we should wrap this up!

ANY FINAL THOUGHTS???

Ren

Don't waste $8!

Check out our last book of the month discussions, HERE!

Blog Tour: The Photo Traveler by Arthur J. Gonzalez - Excerpt & Giveaway

This is a stop on Arthur J. Gonzalez's tour for his young adult time travel novel, The Photo Traveler. There's a giveaway toward the bottom of this post!

Check out the other blogs participating in Arthur's blog tour.

THE PHOTO TRAVELER
by Arthur J. Gonzalez
Genre: YA Paranormal, Time Travel

Seventeen-year-old Gavin Hillstone is resigned to being miserable for the rest of his life. Left alone in the world after his parents died in a fire when he was four, he was placed in foster care, which for him meant ending up in an abusive home with an alcoholic adoptive father.

Gavin’s only escape is in taking and creating images. His camera is his refuge from the unending torture and isolation of daily life in his “family.”

Until he learns by accident that he isn’t alone in the world after all. His father’s parents are still alive and living in Washington DC.

When he takes the plunge and travels 3,000 miles to find his grandparents, he learns that they—and he—are part of something much bigger, and more dangerous, than he could ever have imagined. Something that has always put his family at risk and that will now threaten his own life, while forever changing it.

He learns that he is one of the last descendants of a small group of Photo Travelers—people who can travel through time and space through images. But his initial excitement turns to fear, when he soon discovers that he and his grandparents are being pursued by the fierce remnants of a radical European Photo Traveler cult, the Peace Hunters. What Gavin has, they want!

His adventure will take him to past eras, like The Great Depression and the Salem Witch Trials. Gavin will have to discover who he really is and must make choices that spell the difference between life and death for himself, for the relatives he now knows and loves, and for the girl he will come to love.

For Gavin Hillstone, life will never be the same.

Goodreads / Amazon / Barnes & Noble

EXCERPT
What do you do when a sudden gust of wind forces your boat totally off course and into the unknown? When from one moment to the next, the life that you thought you’d always be living morphs into one you’d never imagined?

Ever since I could remember, I believed there had to be something more to life than the one I’d been thrown into as a child. Even though I sometimes told myself I had to be crazy because just the idea seemed so hard to imagine—given how things had gone so far, anyway.

I would ask myself if it was wrong for me to feel this way. If I was being naïve to think there was something greater out there. Something that really belonged to me. But what do you if you feel an unknown force pulsating through your blood, constantly reminding you of it? Are you just supposed to ignore it?

I suppose that most of the time that’s what they teach us to do. You know, “Forget it. Take the easy way out.” Sure. Never the right one.

That’s what they kept telling me. “You’re kidding yourself if you think you can have a better life. Learn to live with what you’ve got.” Things like that.

Maybe that’s why I started taking photos as soon as I got my hands on my first camera. It was a way I could distance myself from the life I was being forced to live. It let me create images of the world around me, finding life in the most ordinary moments…like when the sun makes a lonely tree sweat and it in turn gives water to a struggling, thirsty grasshopper below. Those things were real. Not the crappy life I’d always been trapped in.

And then, just a few weeks ago, my life took a turn for the unexpected. And now all I have to say to you is—believe in your gut instinct. Intuition is what kept me alive. It’s what made me believe. At the end of the day, it was all I really had that was mine. And you can find what’s really yours, too.


GIVEAWAY!

This giveaway is open internationally. Thank you, Arthur!

a Rafflecopter giveaway 
MEET THE AUTHOR

WEBSITE
FACEBOOK
TWITTER
GOODREADS

My name is Arthur J Gonzalez. I’m 28 years old, born and raised in Miami, FL. I graduated from the University of Florida. I am currently releasing my debut novel, The Photo Traveler. The premise surrounds 17 – year old Gavin, who discovers he is part of a small group, called Photo Travelers, who can time travel through photos and images.

Blog Tour: A Surefire Way by J.T. Bock

I'm happy to introduce you to a pretty awesome-looking book today. I look forward to reading it myself! From what I hear, A Surefire Way, by J.T. Bock, delivers the following:

• a group of superhumans (UltraAgents) joined to protect citizens from evildoers—for a pre-contracted fee
• a kick-butt, rookie agent with daddy issues who doesn't follow the rules
• a quick-tempered boss annoyed with his rookie agent for not following the rules
• a flawed, yet incredibly attractive, hero afraid of bugs
• a half-roach villain with an ego problem
• a self-absorbed, vengeful god set to destroy the world (What else would a god do with his time?)
• a sexy goddess with a personality disorder
• a forbidden romance and even more forbidden sexytime
• loads of action and adventure like running, jumping, shooting guns and things, traveling to alternate worlds, battling cranky gods, bouncing a head around, searching for creepy Aztec skulls, and other fun stuff
• did we mention forbidden love?

Check out the giveaway at the end of this post for an opportunity to win a digital copy of A Surefire Way, along with some possible extras. And follow the blog tour by visiting the other tour stops, listed here.

A SUREFIRE WAY
by J.T. Bock
Page Count: 393 Genre: Paranormal Romance, Romantic Suspense, Humor

UltraAgent Surefire’s plan is simple: Capture the transhuman thief Raven. Win back the respect of her father. Get a raise.

Easy, right?

Except Surefire just broke the number one rule of her employer, UltraSecurity, a niche security firm that solves crimes committed by genetically enhanced humans like Raven. She trailed Raven into a warehouse without backup. And something more powerful than any transhuman is waiting inside.

Raven’s plan is simple: Atone for his past crimes. Return stolen spiritual artifacts to restore the world’s balance. Don’t get caught by UltraSecurity.

Easy, right?

Until a spunky UltraSecurity agent is suddenly on his tail, although Raven wishes she was on … well, never mind … he can’t get distracted from his mission. Because she’s followed him into a warehouse filled with his reclaimed relics, and Raven’s ex-partner in crime is about to unleash a supernatural-sized complication into his plan.

His old partner has accidentally summoned an Aztec god who will destroy the world unless Raven stops this spirit with a superiority complex. To do this, Raven must team up with Surefire and reveal the truth about his powers, exposing her to a force that can either save the world or destroy them both.

Following Raven into that warehouse throws Surefire into a surreal world filled with moody gods, day-glo skulls, dizzying dimensional portals, maniacal half-roach magicians, and a sexy thief who is more than he appears under his snug t-shirt. Is Raven a criminal, or is he working for a higher power? Surefire needs to be certain, because if she joins him on this mission, she’ll have to surrender everything she believed in for a surefire way to save the world, discover her destiny and find true love.

Goodreads / Amazon

GIVEAWAY!
Thanks to J.T. Bock for this giveaway!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

MEET THE AUTHOR

WEBSITE
TWITTER
GOODREADS

When J.T. Bock was a child, she wanted to be James Bond or Indiana Jones or a vampire hunter or Wonder Woman. Whatever brought her the most action, adventure and romance while play acting on her stage—otherwise known as her grandmother’s basement. Now J.T. has assembled her own team of action heroes, supernatural creatures and maniacal villains and set them on adventures far from her basement to exotic lands and alternate dimensions.

From a secret location outside of Washington, DC, J.T. conjures these pulse-pounding tales to share with those kindred readers looking for an exciting escape. Her alternate identity enjoys spending time with her workaholic husband and their sidekick rescue dog, traveling to interesting locales (San Diego Comic-Con), and enjoying life to the fullest with an amazing group of family and friends and a good glass of wine.

Check out J.T.’s latest adventures on her website (www.jtbock.com) or find her by flashing her initials in the sky, opening up her favorite bottle of Pinot Noir.

Book Blitz: Blood and Snow by RaShelle Workman

We're happy to participate in RaShelle Markman's book blitz, hosted by Xpresso Book Tours, for Blood and Snow. This is a young adult paranormal omnibus work, containing the twelve volumes of Markman's Blood and Snow series.

There's a giveaway at the end of this post! A big giveaway.

 

BLOOD AND SNOW
by RaShelle Workman
Genre: Young Adult Paranormal

Every thousand years the Vampire Queen selects a new body, always the fairest in the land, and this time she's chosen Snow White.

Snow isn't an ordinary girl. She doesn't know that yet.

When Snow gets bitten by a Hunter, her life is thrown into a whirlwind of change where instead of worrying about what to eat, she has to fight not to drink the blood of fellow high school students. She becomes a revenant - not quite human, not quite vampire.

With the help of an eccentric old Professor, his seven adoptive sons, and her best friend, Snow learns to control her blood craving. Sort of. She drinks a bloodlust tea, but she'd rather drink from her Hunter.

Or, a human.

She also discovers a whole other realm, one filled with fairies, dragons, and magic. And not only does the Vampire Queen want her, but there's a pendant called the Seal of Gabriel created for Snow by the Vampire Queen's twin sister. And Snow's supposed to use it to restore balance to all magical creatures. Including vampires.

EXCERPT
“Welcome to my secret fortress, Silindra,” Titan said.

I grunted my response, walking past him to the doorway in the mountain, its entry bursting with light. The surface my feet touched was smooth and hard, like polished rock. But it wasn’t rock. It was some kind of iron. It swayed slightly, and I grabbed hold of the rails.

This is incredible, Snow White said.

I agreed wholeheartedly. Metal catwalks crisscrossed each other, reminding me of a spider’s web. Tall beams rose to the ceiling where millions of lights shone. It was as though Titan harnessed a portion of the sun, and somehow held its ray’s captive within.

In the center of the mountain, and vertical, reaching the top and I guessed touching the bottom, was a thick grated tube. Inside the tube were two sets of stairs. One used to walk up, and the other for down. A steady flow of occupants used them; exiting through archways onto walkways like the one I was on. The walkways led to large, cylinder-shaped holes carved into the mountain.

Cautious, I glanced over the side and felt my throat drop into my stomach. A seemingly endless amount of walkways weaved from the center stairs, and downward.

I took a deep breath, noting the tang of something sour, like curdled milk. The voices of thousands echoed as trolls, fairies, gremlins, and other magical creatures busily rushed around. Like a strange city.

“What is this place,” I finally asked.

“This is Varden. The place where all the scientific magic happens,” he responded, pushing his bulky body past me, walking briskly along the path. The metal shuddered under his weight, and I held my breath. Snow let out a tiny scream.

I tried to calm my nerves and Snow’s.

It’ll hold him, I told her and myself. And I hoped I was right.

When he reached the stairs, he turned. “Do you want the strength of a troll or not?” Lifting my chin, I said, “Of course I do.”

GIVEAWAY
The author, RaShelle, is kind enough to give away a Kindle Fire! You can enter using the Rafflecopter form below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

MEET THE AUTHOR

Website / Goodreads / Facebook / Twitter

RASHELLE WORKMAN lives on a mountain with her husband, three children, and three dogs. From her back porch she can see the city lights and imagine... She's the bestselling author of the Dead Roses series (Sleeping Roses is being translated into Turkish, and will be available in print wherever Turkish books are sold in 2014), the Immortal Essence series, and the Blood and Snow series.